Today has been a strange day. Two different people (not known by eachother) phoned me today and told me they’ve found a lump in their breast. The other one was still going in for more tests, the other is certain to have an operation. I don’t know how to feel apart from scared. Scared for both of them and scared for myself. Feel very deflated. Sometimes life reminds us of its fragility in the most cruel ways. Hopefully both of them are going to be fine. Hopefully all that is left from this day will be a check on life’s priorities. At the moment, hope is what’s needed. Actually, the beardy bloke in the Matrix Reloaded did say one comprehensible thing: ‘Hope, it is the quintessential human delusion, simultaneously the source of your greatest strength, and your greatest weakness’. Delusion or not, it’s what gets people through times like these.
Talking about the Matrix, I had my first mail from a complete stranger yesterday, who was a bit upset about my harsh review of the film. I should apparently study Hinduism and the vedas. Well, in my opinion, a films ultimate purpose is to entertain. And if it fails to do that, because it’s so wrapped up in its own self-importance, no amount of philosophy can save it. I should probably make it clear that I loved the first Matrix. I think it delivered the message brilliantly, whilst still remaining an utterly enjoyable experience.
And as far as my personal priority check goes, I found an old picture of Stu, I took about four years ago. I remember the day I took it and how happy I was. At that point in time I probably didn’t even realise how trying times we would have to get through. But we’ve gotten through them together, and it’s been one hell of a ride. And every day I love you more and more. And I am still as happy.